Edu-folk Envy (and why no such thing exists)

Meet Alejandra Chavez (in pink, also goes by "Urilena") and her gregarious older sister, Yiselina. They stayed in the same house as me for the first two months, arriving at their grandparents house because apparently their parents just couldn't handle them. Cue two glorious summer months of teaching English and hauling river water up the hill.
Uri is a bit of a workhorse; she's long since abandoned her schooling because manual labor suits her. Yisel is a tramposa (cheater) and like tramposas everywhere, she's super crafty and… well, even just thinking about playing games with her makes me want to strangle a rooster. One time, she stole my black marker, and while we were playing dominoes… (I just actually, physically shuddered at the thought) She's going to make so many people so miserable someday.
During my twice-daily, sometimes 24-times daily English classes, the sisters Chavez would stare wide-eyed, mouths slightly agape, trying to comprehend the incomprehensibleness of the English language. We never moved past the names of letters (ay, bee, see, dee, etc).
Fast-forward to one of the last days of their stay in Los Bueyes, and I ask Uri, "Me diga las letras en ingles." She begins with A… B…. C…. D…. ehhhh (confused look right here). I'm like, "ehh, entonces, en español??"
She's like, "ah… bay… say… day… (confused look right here, too)." And Yisel chimes in with this bombshell: "Ella nunca apprendío el abecedario." (She never learned the alphabet)
She's 10. Aaaaand that's why I don't envy the education volunteers.